“Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else have your way.” – Daniele Vare, Italian diplomat
We all negotiate, this morning I had a 3-minute conversation with my 4-year-old about why I needed to get back to work and couldn’t stay with her. We eventually negotiated an agreement where I would return after work and continue to play with her. Yesterday I negotiated the cost of repairing a 2011 Dodge Grand Caravan, the body shop was happy about getting paid for the work required, the owner was happy to have their car repaired, and the insurance company was happy because they did not have to pay for unnecessary operations or inflated labor rates. Thankfully I successfully negotiated both situations to our mutual benefit, my 4-year-old was not left crying as I got in the car and the repair facility was paid fairly for the necessary repairs. I have not always been this successful in my negotiation, there have been plenty of times where that same 4-year-old has negotiated her way to another cookie or I ended up authorizing that additional repair time on a damaged door panel because the shop would not budge. Over time I have learned and refined my negotiating skills but I would like to get better, what are some of your best negotiating skills / tips?
My tip: Stop attacking the other person and attack the problem together!